Bad Day
Bad Day
An elderly couple was taking an evening stroll thru a neighborhood park, enjoying the sunset. Out of nowhere the old man is hit square in the forehead with a giant glob of bird droppings. He's instantly mad. He looks over at his wife and she's frantically digging in her purse.
"What are you looking for now?", he asks.
"Just thought maybe I had a small bit of toilet paper or something to wipe with in my purse."
"You crazy old woman, that bird's probably a half mile from here by now".
"What are you looking for now?", he asks.
"Just thought maybe I had a small bit of toilet paper or something to wipe with in my purse."
"You crazy old woman, that bird's probably a half mile from here by now".
1932 Ford 5 window coupe. 302/C4
1962 8V-390/C6 Unibody Short Bed Soon to be Big Window - The Lincoln that never was
2013 F150 Super Crew Eco Boost 4x4
2015 Ford Edge for the little lady, because she said so!
2007 Mustang GT, 4.6-3V/5 Speed. Only 8680 miles on the clock.
More toys, I need more toys!!!
1962 8V-390/C6 Unibody Short Bed Soon to be Big Window - The Lincoln that never was
2013 F150 Super Crew Eco Boost 4x4
2015 Ford Edge for the little lady, because she said so!
2007 Mustang GT, 4.6-3V/5 Speed. Only 8680 miles on the clock.
More toys, I need more toys!!!
Re: Bad Day
I think gramps is a little coo-coo himself
.
.
.
[b]'' I think what scares me the most about you guys is that I understand you '' ..... KID
'' lookin good, a little paint adds at least 100hp!'' ....... COOTER
'' well an old guy can dream cant he? ''............ICEMAN
''I would donate organs before selling my slick''........ HOOFBEAT RACER
.
.
[b]'' I think what scares me the most about you guys is that I understand you '' ..... KID
'' lookin good, a little paint adds at least 100hp!'' ....... COOTER
'' well an old guy can dream cant he? ''............ICEMAN
''I would donate organs before selling my slick''........ HOOFBEAT RACER
Re: Bad Day
that's funny chit
it's never too late to have a happy childhood
1966 Long Box 5/8 ton
2012 F150 XLT Super Crew 3.5 TWIN TURBO ......yee haw
2000 Road King
1966 Long Box 5/8 ton
2012 F150 XLT Super Crew 3.5 TWIN TURBO ......yee haw
2000 Road King
Re: Bad Day
That reminds me of the old story about the couple taking a walk when he looked up in a tree and a bird let loose and it fell right in his mouth. He said to his wife, Man, if i hadnt my mouth open he would have crapped right in my face!
- Alan Mclennan
- Posts: 9324
- Joined: October 14, 2006, 6:16 pm
- Location: In the shed... Cranebrook NSW
Re: Bad Day
Lowell wrote:That reminds me of the old story about the couple taking a walk when he looked up in a tree and a bird let loose and it fell right in his mouth. He said to his wife, Man, if i hadnt my mouth open he would have crapped right in my face!
yeah and aren`t you glad cows don`t fly!...
Honey, If I say I`ll fix something I will, there`s no need to remind me every 6 months!!
66 f100 tabletop swb 351 Clevo C6 "Beryl"
Slick Stock 3 KCMO
Slick Stock 4 Altoona
Slick Stock 5 KCMO
Slick Stock 6 Altoona
Slick Stock 7 Salina KS
Slick Stock 8..............................
66 f100 tabletop swb 351 Clevo C6 "Beryl"
Slick Stock 3 KCMO
Slick Stock 4 Altoona
Slick Stock 5 KCMO
Slick Stock 6 Altoona
Slick Stock 7 Salina KS
Slick Stock 8..............................
Re: Bad Day
One day a couple years ago, I was cutting up this old tree at my Moms with the chainsaw.. It was August ..and HOT !
So I finally got to a point where I was tired and my saw had just run out of gas.. I sat the saw down, stood there just
feeling so sweaty, dirty and tired.. I reached over with my right hand and pulled the big leather glove off of my left hand..
and not 2 seconds later something hit my hand hard enough to make it drop about two inches.. I looked over and my hand
was even hotter, and something was running between my fingers.. it nearly felt like blood. The ENTIRE back of my hand was
covered with a giant HOT RUNNY bird poo.. The "spot" on my hand went from my wrist to my knuckles, and the whole width
of my palm.. it was still running over the sides ! I swear I almost up chucked it right there. I was terrified to look up just in
case he ( the bird ) was still in the area.
I found a clump of grass growing from the ground and started to wipe it off, sheesh there was so much I had to walk around
clump to clump to get it off ! It was the first time it had ever happened to me, and it must have been a freaking giant pelican
from about 2000 feet over head.. man it was gross..
So I finally got to a point where I was tired and my saw had just run out of gas.. I sat the saw down, stood there just
feeling so sweaty, dirty and tired.. I reached over with my right hand and pulled the big leather glove off of my left hand..
and not 2 seconds later something hit my hand hard enough to make it drop about two inches.. I looked over and my hand
was even hotter, and something was running between my fingers.. it nearly felt like blood. The ENTIRE back of my hand was
covered with a giant HOT RUNNY bird poo.. The "spot" on my hand went from my wrist to my knuckles, and the whole width
of my palm.. it was still running over the sides ! I swear I almost up chucked it right there. I was terrified to look up just in
case he ( the bird ) was still in the area.
I found a clump of grass growing from the ground and started to wipe it off, sheesh there was so much I had to walk around
clump to clump to get it off ! It was the first time it had ever happened to me, and it must have been a freaking giant pelican
from about 2000 feet over head.. man it was gross..
Re: Bad Day
I was maybe 6 years old, my dad would take me and my older brother to get donuts on Saturday mornings. One morning, my dad had just pulled a donut out of the bag and before he even got a bite, a bird flew by and gave it an additional coating of white poo! He was pretty mad and threw the donut on to the ground!
Simon
65 f 100
56 willys m38a1 SOLD ( Have had since high school )
65 f 100
56 willys m38a1 SOLD ( Have had since high school )
Re: Bad Day
I was riding bikes with my oldest sister as a kid. A bird crapped on my shoulder and she started laughing and teasing me. Wasn't big, but it was bird carp on my t-shirt. She made fun of me all the way home. Just as we went up the back step she started to say something else and stopped mid sentence. I looked back at her as I was going thru the kitchen door and she was just standing there, not moving, but she looked funny. I looked closer and she had some bird crap running down her lip. Yes, that bird hit her open mouth (yes, a huge target but I was still a big fan of the bird) while she was teasing me. I laughed so hard mom couldn't figure out what was going on. Me laughing like a crazy person, rolling around on the kitchen floor and my sister standing outside crying and unable to talk.
I had forgotten completely about this little episode in my life until reading some of your posts. Maybe that is why I found this joke so funny in the first place. Now if a bird will crap on my other sister my life will be complete!
SPark
I had forgotten completely about this little episode in my life until reading some of your posts. Maybe that is why I found this joke so funny in the first place. Now if a bird will crap on my other sister my life will be complete!
SPark
1932 Ford 5 window coupe. 302/C4
1962 8V-390/C6 Unibody Short Bed Soon to be Big Window - The Lincoln that never was
2013 F150 Super Crew Eco Boost 4x4
2015 Ford Edge for the little lady, because she said so!
2007 Mustang GT, 4.6-3V/5 Speed. Only 8680 miles on the clock.
More toys, I need more toys!!!
1962 8V-390/C6 Unibody Short Bed Soon to be Big Window - The Lincoln that never was
2013 F150 Super Crew Eco Boost 4x4
2015 Ford Edge for the little lady, because she said so!
2007 Mustang GT, 4.6-3V/5 Speed. Only 8680 miles on the clock.
More toys, I need more toys!!!
- Alan Mclennan
- Posts: 9324
- Joined: October 14, 2006, 6:16 pm
- Location: In the shed... Cranebrook NSW
Re: Bad Day
A bird crapping on you is supposed to be a sign of good luck, but it`s a different story with Corn Bats, so be careful in Altoona at Slick Stock............
Honey, If I say I`ll fix something I will, there`s no need to remind me every 6 months!!
66 f100 tabletop swb 351 Clevo C6 "Beryl"
Slick Stock 3 KCMO
Slick Stock 4 Altoona
Slick Stock 5 KCMO
Slick Stock 6 Altoona
Slick Stock 7 Salina KS
Slick Stock 8..............................
66 f100 tabletop swb 351 Clevo C6 "Beryl"
Slick Stock 3 KCMO
Slick Stock 4 Altoona
Slick Stock 5 KCMO
Slick Stock 6 Altoona
Slick Stock 7 Salina KS
Slick Stock 8..............................
Re: Bad Day
Lance, you had me laughing OUT LOUD and UNCONTROLLABLY. thanks ,man, I needed that! sorry you got pooed on tho. Jeff
it's never too late to have a happy childhood
1966 Long Box 5/8 ton
2012 F150 XLT Super Crew 3.5 TWIN TURBO ......yee haw
2000 Road King
1966 Long Box 5/8 ton
2012 F150 XLT Super Crew 3.5 TWIN TURBO ......yee haw
2000 Road King
Re: Bad Day
I think a corn bat pooped in my drink at SlickStock....
Cause I woke up with a headache the next morning
Cause I woke up with a headache the next morning
.
.
.
[b]'' I think what scares me the most about you guys is that I understand you '' ..... KID
'' lookin good, a little paint adds at least 100hp!'' ....... COOTER
'' well an old guy can dream cant he? ''............ICEMAN
''I would donate organs before selling my slick''........ HOOFBEAT RACER
.
.
[b]'' I think what scares me the most about you guys is that I understand you '' ..... KID
'' lookin good, a little paint adds at least 100hp!'' ....... COOTER
'' well an old guy can dream cant he? ''............ICEMAN
''I would donate organs before selling my slick''........ HOOFBEAT RACER
- Alan Mclennan
- Posts: 9324
- Joined: October 14, 2006, 6:16 pm
- Location: In the shed... Cranebrook NSW
Re: Bad Day
Pat, we`ll have to get some of those Little Umbrellas for our beers mate!
Honey, If I say I`ll fix something I will, there`s no need to remind me every 6 months!!
66 f100 tabletop swb 351 Clevo C6 "Beryl"
Slick Stock 3 KCMO
Slick Stock 4 Altoona
Slick Stock 5 KCMO
Slick Stock 6 Altoona
Slick Stock 7 Salina KS
Slick Stock 8..............................
66 f100 tabletop swb 351 Clevo C6 "Beryl"
Slick Stock 3 KCMO
Slick Stock 4 Altoona
Slick Stock 5 KCMO
Slick Stock 6 Altoona
Slick Stock 7 Salina KS
Slick Stock 8..............................
Re: Bad Day
Alan Mclennan wrote:Pat, we`ll have to get some of those Little Umbrellas for our beers mate!
So THATS what those things are for !
.
.
.
[b]'' I think what scares me the most about you guys is that I understand you '' ..... KID
'' lookin good, a little paint adds at least 100hp!'' ....... COOTER
'' well an old guy can dream cant he? ''............ICEMAN
''I would donate organs before selling my slick''........ HOOFBEAT RACER
.
.
[b]'' I think what scares me the most about you guys is that I understand you '' ..... KID
'' lookin good, a little paint adds at least 100hp!'' ....... COOTER
'' well an old guy can dream cant he? ''............ICEMAN
''I would donate organs before selling my slick''........ HOOFBEAT RACER
Re: Bad Day
Man, you guys had me laughing so much my sides were aching. That one about
the giant Pelican Poo on Lances hand and Steve's sister killed me. So with that in mind.....
This....
One summer when I was in my 20s I was driving thru town going who knows where
and I was stopped at a red light. The car didn't have A/C so all the windows were down.
A carload of Mexican kids pulled up to the light next to me and before the green came
on a bird flew over and crapped on my left arm I had resting on the door and I looked
at it and said "Eeeeeeeeewwwwwww" and those Mexican kids busted out laughing.
Kinda felt a little like Lance did for a bit, but it was pretty funny! TR
the giant Pelican Poo on Lances hand and Steve's sister killed me. So with that in mind.....
This....
One summer when I was in my 20s I was driving thru town going who knows where
and I was stopped at a red light. The car didn't have A/C so all the windows were down.
A carload of Mexican kids pulled up to the light next to me and before the green came
on a bird flew over and crapped on my left arm I had resting on the door and I looked
at it and said "Eeeeeeeeewwwwwww" and those Mexican kids busted out laughing.
Kinda felt a little like Lance did for a bit, but it was pretty funny! TR
- Johnny Canuck
- Posts: 8288
- Joined: April 9, 2006, 11:14 pm
- Location: Edmonton, Alberta.
Re: Bad Day
When we were teenagers, my cousin Bob always made me jealous, he had the long gold flowing locks like Greg Allman.
Their family were not the dressing up type, but I remember being over at their place visiting one time, when one of our other cousins was getting married.
So Bob washed his long blonde hair, and it took a long time to get it dry. Plus, he got in a suit for the first time I could remember in his life! and we headed for the church to the wedding...
but the second he stepped off the back porch to go, a bird crapped RIGHT in the middle of the part in his hair. I laughed so hard i near peed myself.
Still makes me laugh when i think of it. it took him another hour to wash his hair and get it dry, by then he missed the wedding LOL
Their family were not the dressing up type, but I remember being over at their place visiting one time, when one of our other cousins was getting married.
So Bob washed his long blonde hair, and it took a long time to get it dry. Plus, he got in a suit for the first time I could remember in his life! and we headed for the church to the wedding...
but the second he stepped off the back porch to go, a bird crapped RIGHT in the middle of the part in his hair. I laughed so hard i near peed myself.
Still makes me laugh when i think of it. it took him another hour to wash his hair and get it dry, by then he missed the wedding LOL
It's a race.. Will hell freeze over or will JC finish his truck first. Stay tuned..