Murder at Coles

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Alan Mclennan
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Murder at Coles

Post by Alan Mclennan »

Coles is our second largest Supermarket chain......

Murder at Coles


Tired of constantly being broke and stuck in an unhappy marriage, a young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance policy on his wife with himself as the beneficiary and then arranging to have her killed.

A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.' Artie explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing out a spouse was $10,000.

The husband said he was willing to pay that amount but that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's insurance money. Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the man opened his wallet, displaying the single dollar coin that rested inside. Artie sighed, rolled his eyes and reluctantly agreed to accept the dollar as down payment for the dirty deed.

A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Coles supermarket. There, he surprised her in the produce department and proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands. As the poor unsuspecting woman drew her last breath and slumped to the floor, the manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene. Unwilling to leave any living witnesses behind, Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.

However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by the hidden security cameras and observed by the shop's security guard, who immediately called the police. Artie was caught and arrested before he could even leave the premises.

Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the whole sordid plan, including his unusual financial arrangements with the hapless husband who was also quickly arrested.


The next day in the newspaper, the headline declared...

(You're going to hate me for this...)






'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for $1.00 @ Coles
Honey, If I say I`ll fix something I will, there`s no need to remind me every 6 months!!
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Casey 65
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Re: Murder at Coles

Post by Casey 65 »

:rotflmao: :laughing:
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ny1964
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Re: Murder at Coles

Post by ny1964 »

That Artie joke smells funny its a little stinker :mrgreen: .
if it goes it goes if it don't it won't unless the hammer is the right size .
LM14
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Re: Murder at Coles

Post by LM14 »

Alan, this joke proves inflation is real.

20 years ago, it was "Artie chokes 3 for a dollar at XXXXX (food store of your choice).

My mother in law used to tell this all the time, I had forgot all about it. Now you have it stuck in my head again!

Thanks,
SPark
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Alan Mclennan
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Location: In the shed... Cranebrook NSW
Australia

Re: Murder at Coles

Post by Alan Mclennan »

LM14 wrote:Alan, this joke proves inflation is real.

20 years ago, it was "Artie chokes 3 for a dollar at XXXXX (food store of your choice).

My mother in law used to tell this all the time, I had forgot all about it. Now you have it stuck in my head again!

Thanks,
SPark


Ah bugger!..................I hate Earworms.... :twisted: ......http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1XfGTO2vh8
Honey, If I say I`ll fix something I will, there`s no need to remind me every 6 months!!
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